Your questions are many so its kinda hard to write definitive answers.

Thats why I am pointing you to the general section What would an anarchist society look like? of the anarchist FAQ. Just to be clear, this is just the opinions of one collective, but since its done in this qiestion/answer style, its a great source even if not every anarchist agrees with their takes. I think your questions mostly relate to part I5 of my linked page.

Oh yeah its easy. Thats means its not a skill issue or communictaion problem for them, its just not what they want to do.

If you got to lemmy.ml and make some post about the failures of leadership leading to recriminalising lgbt love and culture people will willingly discuss it. Or how there were flaws in their women’s lib attempts that lead to pay disparities and so on.

Not really my experience. I think its up to the mods mood that day or if they read you as “a good socialist” thats allowed to have critiques or as a “bad socialist” that somehow isnt allowed to have critiques.

PTB

But weird to me that people use this post as a basis to go to another community and start doing exactly what got the OP banned.