Well that escalated quickly

Hard disagree on that one. If every group of people you are involved with is “toxic,” then it’s probably time for a long hard look in the mirror.

I hate to say it, but this feels like an unfortunate personal experience being overgeneralized. Friend groups can be incredible. They can also be what OP describes, and rightfully calls out given how toxic those situations are, but decrying the concept of the friend group attributes the problem far too broadly.

There are shitty poly people, there are shitty monogamous people?

Meh.

Having been in the poly community this is really accurate. It’s messy and complicated and you have waaaay less fun than you think.

It’s a big reason why I avoid people now.